Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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