He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
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