im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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