i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
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