Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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