I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
