i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
