Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
