Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We have so much sex to catch up on
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
