i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Randomize