She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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