I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
