new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
This gyro tastes like lonliness
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
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