cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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