He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize