I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i came on her dog
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
