that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
