I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
