So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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