This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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