it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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