brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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