Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
