I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
You can't motorboat a personality
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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