i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
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