How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
