Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
