Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize