What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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