woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
