also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
