yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
