This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
