chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
