dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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