You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
