I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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