Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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