Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
