Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
