Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize