So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm sobbing to NWA
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
