So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
