return my video game
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
