I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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