grandma shit on top of the toilet
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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