i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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