I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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