Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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