I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
